Stay At Home Mom's Have the HARDEST Job In The World

So yesterday I said in a post that parenthood is a job where you don't get to have time off. Today I want to elaborate on that.


Being young, most of my friends can not relate to me and my way of life. By that I mean, they don't understand what it is like to be a stay at home mom. I hear them all complain about being tired and over worked, and how much they sacrifice and it makes me laugh inside. Trust me, these 'girls' don't know what tired is, and they REALLY don't know what sacrifice is.


For the last 18 months my body has not been my own. For the nearly 10 months I was pregnant (39 weeks is nearly 10 months - whoever came up with this 9 month thing is MENTAL) my body belonged to the daughter inside me. Everything I ate, everything I drank, every bath I took, every nap I had, EVERYTHING I did was all about the baby I was growing inside me. After pregnancy, the self-sacrifice did not stop. Since February I have be breastfeeding solely (my daughter WILL NOT take formula or a bottle at all). So I still have to watch what I eat and drink so that my breast-milk is not affected.


Not only have I been sacrificing my body for Charlotte in the last 18 months, but I also sacrifice my health. When I got sick when I was pregnant, I couldn't take anything and even most natural remedies were off limits. I'd just have to be sick and let it pass. Since  I am breastfeeding that still hasn't changed. Only difference is I can't get the rest I need to get better.


And all you women out there who think you are always tired, why don't you get back to me when you are awake for 20 hours a day for 3 months....


Being a stay at home mom is a 365 day a year job. You work at least 12 hours a day, Monday-Friday, every weekend and all holidays. It isn't as though you can take a sick day and someone can cover for you. You are the sole person who is 'employed' and the success of your job lies only with you. When your sick, you want to nap, but when you are a stay at home mom, there is no time for naps. If your child isn't napping (like mine NEVER wants to do) then you can not nap. Your life is not your own; it revolves around someone entirely different.


And you know, if being a stay at home mom was just about the childcare, then all would be great. But the stay at home mom is also the mom of many jobs. Aside from childcare, the stay at home mom also is a chef, a pre-school teacher, chauffeur, owner of a laundry mat, jungle-jim, maid, personal secretary (for husband and children), life coach/guidance councilor, doctor  and entertainment co-coordinator, just to name a few job responsibilities.


Truly, the hardest yet most under appreciated jobs there is. Everyone looks at the working woman in awe, but when they see a stay at home mom, they feel pity. Pity for the 'uneducated' woman with nothing to do. Well let me tell you, many of us are educated, and there is ALWAYS something to do.


So next time you complain about your job, how tired you are, and how you 'give so much', think about the stay at home mom. She has you topped! But chances are, as frazzled as she is, her job is a million times more rewarding that yours, and she wouldn't trade it for anything.

Good Mommy or Bad Mommy - take the test

So apparently talking on your cell-phone and using a stroller past the time your child knows how to walk, makes you a bad mommy. Or so Jane Brody of the NY times says. Apparently where she lives in Brooklyn, all the moms are pushing their babies and older toddlers in strollers while talking on their Blackberries or listening to their iPods and ignoring/neglecting their children.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/29/health/29brod.html?pagewanted=2&_r=1&ref=health

I think Ms. Brody is a little out of touch (taking a child who JUST learned how to walk to the mall or an airport WITHOUT a stroller is mommy suicide, and when she had young children there were no cellphones or mp3 players, so how can she know she would be any different?) 

But this is not the only thing that makes mommies bad. All you have to do is read a parenting magazine, talk to your doctor, have a discussion with your mom or mother-in-law, or talk to another mother, and you will feel bad about how you parent.

So here is the test: GOOD MOMMY OR BAD MOMMY

#1. Where does your child sleep

a)crib/his own bed

b)co-sleep

#2. Did you 

a)Breastfeed 

or 

b)Formula feed?

#3. What do your feed your child

a)pre-packed meals, store bought babyfood

b)home cooked organic meals

#4. Do you

a)vaccinate your children

or

b)not vaccinate your children

#5. How often is your child in daycare?

a)never, I am a stay at home mom

b)very rarely, I work part time

c)Monday-Friday, 8am-5pm

d)never, I have a nanny

#6. Are you

a)a single parent

or

b)a married/common law parent

Results:

#1. Where does your child sleep

a)crib/his own bed - BAD MOMMY

How can you leave your child alone all night or put them in a sleep cage. Your child will have separation issues and will always have sleeping issues.

b)co-sleep - BAD MOMMY

How selfish of you to bring your child to bed with you. You could roll and smother your child at any time and you severely hurt your personal/sexual life when your child in in your bed. A bed is for sleep and sex, not a resting place for the entire family.

#2. Did/Do you 

a)Breastfeed - BAD MOMMY

While you did pass on some healthy food and immunities to your child, you forced them into an unhealthy bond with you. These children will have severe separation anxiety and will have concentration issues in school

b)Formula feed? - BAD MOMMY

How could you be so selfish and not breastfeed? You would rather feed your child artificially created food than latch a baby onto your breast? (that IS what it is there for) Your children will obese and be less intelligent than breastfed babies

#3. What do your feed your child

a)pre-packed meals, store bought babyfood - BAD MOMMY

You stock your child full of preservatives and second rate food. Your child will either be malnourished, lack essential vitamins or be obese.

b)home cooked organic meals - BAD MOMMY

You waste all your time cooking instead of playing and teaching your children. You also create picky eaters when you only feed a small variation of foods.

#4. Do you

a)vaccinate your children - BAD MOMMY

You put your child at risk for Autism! You sadistic woman!

b)not vaccinate your children - BAD MOMMY

You are the reason disease and sickness spreads across the world.

#5. How often is your child in daycare?

a)never, I am a stay at home mom - BAD MOMMY

Your child will not be properly socialized and will have an unhealthy attachment to you.

b)rarely, I work part time - BAD MOMMY

Your child will have severe separation issues and they never know when you will be with them or when you won't, or how long you will be gone.

c)Monday-Friday, 8am-5pm - BAD MOMMY

Your child will grow up and not know you. This will lead to identity issues and they will have trouble forming loving bonds

d)never, I have a nanny - BAD MOMMY

Your child will grow to view your nanny as their motherly figure. They will not be able to form a loving bond with you.

#6. Are you

a)a single parent - BAD MOMMY

You do not give your child enough outlets for love, and introducing many different people into their lives (your dates) confuses them.

b)a married/common law parent - BAD MOMMY

You do not show by example that there are many different forms of a 'family'. You give them divided attention (between themselves and your spouse) and you no doubt-ably fight in front of them, which isn't healthy for children to view.

OK, so hopefully by now you realize that I made that whole quiz up. There is so much differing information out there that no matter what you do, you are damned if you do, damned if you don't. I think that as long as you raise a healthy, happy, social child that you are doing a good job. Don't let anyone sway you from what you think is the right thing to do for your child, because let's face it: YOU ARE THE MOM. You know what is best for your own child, and a comfortable, confident mommy is a GOOD mommy!!!